Banarasidas ARDHAKATHANAK (A Half Story) Read online

  At this time, a son was born to him.(588)

  In the month of Ashadh, in Samvat 1676,

  His son was born. At this time, his interest in religion too was at a peak.

  A year later,

  His mother died in Agra.(589)

  His mother died in Samvat 1677.

  He performed the final alms-giving for her as best he could.

  In Samvat 1679, his son and his wife, both died;

  And he became engaged for a third time(590)

  To the daughter of Bega Sahu, who belonged to the Kukri gotra.

  Banarasi went to Khairabad a third time

  To get married. This was in Samvat 1680.

  He returned home, once again a grihast.(591)

  At that time, in Khairabad, Banarasi met Arathmal Dhor,

  Who spoke of Adhyatma with great vigour and enthusiasm.

  He became a friend of Banarasi,

  And gave him a commentary that had been written on the Samaysar Natak.(592)

  Rajmalla, a scholar, had written this commentary.

  That was the work that Arathmal Dhor placed before Banarasi,

  And said, ‘Banarasi, read this.

  You will know Truth.’(593)

  Banarasi would read the commentary every day,

  And think deeply about its meaning.

  He could not understand the true nature of Adhyatma,

  But he lost his faith in rites and rituals, which no longer held any meaning for him.(594)

  The performance of rituals no longer held any joy for him,

  But he could not appreciate the spiritual aspects either.

  Banarasi’s condition became similar to

  That of a camel’s fart, which hangs between earth and sky.(595)

  Then a miracle took place within Banarasi’s heart.

  A desire for renunciation began to arise within him.

  At this time he composed the Gyanpachisi, in which he wrote about the meaning of knowledge;

  And the Dhyanbatisi, in which he pondered the path to meditation.(596)

  He also composed songs of spiritual life,

  In which he related many aspects of past behaviour;

  As well as the Sivamandir,

  And many other poems.(597)

  The outward forms of worship, the rites of samayik and pratikraman—

  Banarasi stopped observing them all.

  The vow that he had taken to give up green vegetables—

  That too he forsook. There was no limit to his disillusionment with ritual.(598)

  This state of mind made Banarasi feel very alone.

  There is little point in relating the story of those days in detail.

  Without any rules of conduct or rituals to follow, Banarasi became a low and vile person.

  During this period, Banarasi went to Sanganer(599)

  As part of the marriage party

  To get Tripurdas married.

  After the wedding, Banarasi returned home.

  He was by now so disillusioned with ritual that he would even eat the food placed as an offering to the gods.(600)

  Then, four foolish and weak-minded men came together.

  They would fool and horse around, playing a game with their shoes:

  They would snatch the turbans off each other’s heads,

  And strike each other three times with their shoes.(601)

  Chandrabhan, Banarasi,

  Udaykaran and Than—

  The four would lark about,

  And say that they were trying to understand Adhyatma.(602)

  The four, divesting themselves of their clothes,

  Would dance around the room

  Declaring, ‘We have become munis!

  We have no material possessions!’(603)

  They would smack each other with their hands,

  And call out loudly,

  ‘Those who doubt us,

  Our shoes upon their heads!’(604)

  They would hear songs and sayings,

  And parody them,

  And say that the substance of Adhyatma

  Was false and untrue, that its meaning could not be found even with a lamp.(605)

  Banarasi’s past deeds appeared as Fate.

  Untruth and sensuality appeared in his life,

  Because of which his mind sank further into perversity, and he continued in folly.

  He refused to listen to the counsel of others.(606)

  As long as his inclination to folly, the result of his karma, persisted,

  No one could destroy the anguish in his heart.

  When this unfortunate result of his karma had run its course,

  His foolish clowning disappeared on its own.(607)

  Everybody—shravak and jati—

  Said Banarasi was empty-headed;

  And that his word could not be relied upon.

  He might be learned, but even so, he and his three friends were disreputable and infamous.(608)

  If someone is disparaged and reviled,

  That is how everybody begins talking of him.

  The townsfolk cannot hold their tongues.

  They will gossip about and comment on everything they see.(609)

  They will talk of what they have heard, and of what they have seen,

  And even gossip about stories they may have made up themselves.

  This is a bad habit that the people of this world have,

  No one can do anything about it.(610)

  When all this fuss died down,

  There came a change in Banarasi’s condition.

  In his heart he would scorn the images of the tirthankars,

  And with his mouth would utter words that should not be said.(611)

  He would take vows and make promises in front of his elders,

  And would break them all upon returning home.

  He would eat all day and all night like an animal;

  He became isolated from others, and remained drunk on falsehood.(612)

  Banarasi’s state

  Worsened day by day.

  Then came Samvat 1684,

  And the month of Ashadh.(613)

  To Banarasi’s third wife

  Her first son was born.

  He lived for a few days and died.

  This world is so transient.(614)

  Emperor Jahangir, lord of Delhi,

  Had ruled for twenty-two years.

  On his way back from Kashmir,

  He suddenly died.(615)

  Four months later,

  Shahjahan Sultan

  Ascended the throne, assumed the insignia of royal power,

  And proclaimed his authority in the land.(616)

  In Samvat 1684,

  The throne of Agra,

  Did he ascend, and took for himself the title

  ‘Sahib Shah Qiran’.(617)

  In Samvat 1685,

  For the second time

  In Banarasi’s house,

  A son was born.(618)

  Within a couple of years,

  The boy’s story came to an end.

  Banarasi’s sons all had short lives—they would be born and they would die.

  Then in Samvat 1687(619)

  In Banarasidas’s home,

  A third son was born.

  In Samvat 1689 a daughter was born.

  These children, too, completed their lives quickly.(620)

  All of Banarasi’s sons and daughters embraced death.

  One son lived a little longer,

  But he too had a short life.

  With this grief, Banarasi himself became as though dead.(621)

  Samvat 1691 passed slowly and steadily.

  Then came Samvat 1692.

  Banarasi’s condition was the same as before,

  He did not change.(622)

  From the beginning of Samvat 1680 to the end of Samvat 1692—

  Banarasi has given an account of the events of this period.

  Some matters remain to be told;

  These he wil
l now relate.(623)

  Banarasi joined the barat

  And went to Chatsu village

  For the wedding of Bacchha’s son;

  He returned home after the wedding.(624)

  And in this period he composed

  Much poetry.

  He composed the Suktimuktavali,

  Which contains about a hundred verses,(625)

  As well as the Adhyatam Battisika,

  Paidi, and Phagu Dhamal.

  He wrote the Sindhu Chaturdasi

  And some miscellaneous poems.(626)

  He also composed Sivapachisi Bhavna,

  Sahas Athotar Nam,

  Karam Chhatisi, and Jhulna

  In which he discusses the differences between Ravan and Ram.(627)

  He composed Ankhen Doi Vidhi

  And wrote two vachanikas,

  As well as many ashtaks and songs—

  There is little point in listing them all here.(628)

  Till Samvat 1692

  All that Banarasi wrote was related to the rasas or sentiments;

  But from then on his poetry

  Began to show glimpses of Syadvad, the Jain doctrine of relativism.(629)

  At this time, suddenly,

  To Agra city

  Came Pandit Rupchand, a learned man,

  Well-versed in Jain scriptures.(630)

  Tihuna Sahu had had a temple built.

  That is where Pandit Rupchand stayed.

  All the Adhyatmis asked him to interpret for them

  And read, the Jain text Gommatsar,(631)

  Which explains the gunasthanas through which the soul must pass on its way to salvation.

  It also discusses right knowledge and right conduct for the attainment of moksha.

  A person’s actions are determined by

  The particular gunasthana which his soul is occupying.(632)

  Thought and action have been explained extensively, and in diverse ways,

  As has the relationship between self-restraint and outward actions.

  All this has been explained from different angles and points of view.

  After listening to the Gommatsar, all doubts disappear.(633)

  Then Banarasi underwent another change.

  He understood the meaning of Syadvad.

  Hearing his guru, Pande Rupchand,

  Read the Gommatsar, Banarasi’s heart filled with joy.(634)

  Within two years of that period,

  Rupchand died.

  Listening to Rupchand’s teachings

  Had made Banarasi a firm Jain.(635)

  Banarasi then composed many works,

  This time in the spirit of Adhyatma.

  The works he had written earlier, and those he wrote now, were similar—

  There was no conflict or contradiction between them.(636)

  There had been some darkness in Banarasi’s heart,

  In his devotion.

  That had now been wiped out, and had been replaced by harmony,

  So that everything was equal, there was no high or low.(637)

  Banarasi now perceived the meaning of Samyagdarshan

  And—as God is his witness—he understood it fully.

  In Samvat 1693,

  He picked up the Samaysar Natak with joy.(638)

  Bhanchand’s student, Banarasi, rendered the Samaysar Natak into Bhasha,

  In seven hundred and twenty-seven verses.

  He had now understood relativism fully.

  It was now Samvat 1696.(639)

  In Banarasi’s house,

  Death came to the third son.

  Banarasi mourned his son deeply.

  He was distracted with grief.(640)

  In this world, attachment and affection have great power.

  They reduce the wise and the foolish to the same level.

  Even after two years had passed in this manner,

  Banarasi received no respite from the grief he felt for his son.(641)

  The fifty-five years

  Of Banarasi’s tale have now been told.

  He married three wives,

  And had two daughters and seven sons.(642)

  Nine children were born and died.

  The husband and wife remained, two alone,

  Like trees that shed their leaves in autumn,

  And are left bare and leafless.(643)

  If one looks at the real nature of things,

  At their true meaning,

  It is clear that the more a man gives up material possessions,

  The greater the peace of mind he attains.(644)

  But wordly men do not know

  The true meaning of this world.

  They think they have achieved status and glory with material possessions;

  Without their wealth and riches they feel themselves in turmoil.(645)

  Now will be related Banarasi’s

  Present virtues and faults.

  He lives in the city of Agra,

  In peace and contentment, with his wife.(646)

  In the composition of poetry on Adhyatma, in Bhasha,

  There is no pandit greater than him.

  A good, forgiving and contented man,

  Great is his art in reciting and reading poetry.(647)

  He can recite Sanskrit and Prakrit correctly,

  And is accomplished in several other languages.

  He knows the distinction between words and their meanings,

  And is not easily swayed by the sorrows of this world.(648)

  He is sweet-spoken, and shows friendship towards all.

  He is a firm believer in Jainism.

  He shows great tolerance and forbearance, and does not speak ill of anyone.

  He is of steady and resolute mind, and does not vacillate.(649)

  He gives good and friendly counsel to all.

  His heart is virtuous, without the smallest trace of depravity or wickedness.

  He does not consort with other men’s wives,

  And has no other vices or bad habits.(650)

  His heart is pure; equilibirum and balance are important to him.

  These are his various virtues,

  Both small and great, related here;

  None of them is outstanding, and none without its faults.(651)

  Banarasi’s virtues have been related here.

  Now his faults will also be told.

  He has little anger, pride or artifice in him,

  But his greed for wealth is great.(652)

  He lacks restraint by nature—the result of his past deeds.

  He does not want to be away from his home.

  He does not practise any rites or rituals, nor does he practise self-restraint.

  He does not give alms, nor does he perform puja.(653)

  A small gain brings him great joy,

  And a small loss makes him worry excessively.

  He does not hesitate to say that which is unspeakable;

  He has studied the art of jesters and clowns with great concentration.(654)

  He tells of matters that should not be told.

  Sometimes, finding himself alone, he breaks into a dance.

  He makes up stories of things not seen, not heard,

  And relates these stories in gatherings.(655)

  He is attracted to funny or comic situations,

  He cannot refrain from telling lies,

  And feelings of great dread and fear overtake him without warning.

  Such is his state and character.(656)

  Sometimes a fault, sometimes a virtue—

  Whichever is meant to appear does so.

  This is Banarasiji’s tale.

  All that is well-known, has been told in broad outline.(657)

  All that is subtle and secret and boundless,

  The nature of that only God knows.

  All that he could remember,

  That Banarasi has related truthfully.(658)

  And the matters he felt were too depraved or foolish,

  Those he h
as not been able to talk of,

  Not even in the shortest, most general terms.

  Only a kevali will be able confess to such matters.(659)

  One life, in one day,

  Passes through so many states,

  That even a kevali cannot describe them all,

  Even though he sees and understands them.(660)

  The one who has been victorious over his senses, the kevali

  He does not spend much time pondering such matters.

  After all, we are insignificant creatures;

  Who will spend time thinking about us?(661)

  So Banarasi says

  That the heart has infinite states.

  He has related the events of his life in the broadest of broad terms,

  Speaking only of the outward aspects of his behaviour and actions.(662)

  The five and fifty years so far,

  Of his life’s story has he related here.

  That which will happen in the future,

  Only God knows.(663)

  He has spoken of the fifty-five years he has lived so far;

  Another fifty-five years of life remain.

  In a man’s life, these remaining years which are yet to be,

  Are the most excellent.(664)

  A hundred and ten years

  Is the span of a man’s life.18

  In Samvat 1698,

  Banarasi’s life is at the midpoint.(665)

  There are three kinds of men

  In this world of men